The group in the conference room sat in silence. No one had spoken for several moments.

Mary rose to her feet. "I should be going."

"Sorry, Ma’am, we didn’t mean to drag all of this up in front of you," Nathan apologized as he and the others politely stood.

"No, I think Josiah was right. It’s time. It’s time you all dealt with it." She paused and lowered her voice. "I imagine Chris will find it difficult."

"More like impossible," Josiah muttered.

"Does he know you’ve been discussing it?"

Josiah glanced at Nathan and grinned. "I vote we don’t tell him."

"I’ll second that."

"What are you lot voting on? Mary," Chris acknowledged as he entered the room.

"Nothing, Chris," Josiah stated innocently

"Nothing at all," Nathan agreed.

"We have been discussing all manner of things, Colonel," Ezra offered.

Chris’s eyes flashed with suspicion. He glanced at J.D. whose expressive face held a multitude of emotions. "J.D.?"

Josiah clamped his hand over J.D.’s mouth.

"Sometimes, Colonel Larabee," Ezra reflected, "it’s better you don’t know what the mice get up to when you are away."

Larabee knew his men intimately and he could guess what had taken place. He also accepted it was necessary. It was time J.D. and Ezra were filled in on the one piece of the puzzle withheld from them. The colonel nodded his understanding and with it, a silent apology. His men understood fully.

For Larabee, the time of weakness had passed. "J.D., I want to know the contents of both of the files Travis has been accessing."

"I’ve got one of them worked out, but the other is still encrypted. It may not have anything to do with you but… I’ve tried everything I can think of, but I just can’t crack the code."

"Ezra?"

"I shall do my best."

"Once you’ve copied the files, J.D., print them out, give me the only copies and then delete them. Delete all copies of them."

"But Colonel, they’re Pentagon secure files. The second one may not have anything to do with us." Larabee’s eyes narrowed. His face darkened. Hell itself was beaming from his soul. J.D. had never been on the end of a Larabee glare before. Now he understood why others turned and ran from his colonel.

"Yes, Sir."

Abruptly, Chris turned, marched out of the office and stepped onto the elevator."

"God, protect Travis," Nathan muttered. Josiah glanced at his friend and nodded solemnly.

**********

"No, Colonel, wait. You can’t go in there!"

General Travis heard the muffled shrieks of his secretary and steeled himself for ‘his’ arrival.

"Travis," Chris snarled as he shoved the door open. The General raised his hand to his three guests, hoping to calm them.

Larabee’s eyes narrowed. Interesting meeting - the CIA, FBI and Ezra’s former boss.

"As you can see, Colonel Larabee, I am in a private meeting," General Travis stated, quickly jumping to his feet and walking toward the man who, for all intents and purposes, actually worked for him.

"I need to talk to you," Larabee insisted.

"I’m afraid..."

"Now." General Travis was not a man to be pushed around and usually Chris didn’t do so - particularly not in front of others. The General licked his suddenly parched lips. He prayed Larabee’s explosive demeanor wasn’t because he’d somehow discovered what was going on. Realistically, there was no way Chris could know. Besides, if Larabee had an inkling of what was taking place, he wouldn’t have burst in so calmly and he certainly wouldn’t have been alone.

"All right. I’ll be a couple of minutes."

Chris stood unmoving as Travis took him by the elbow and attempted to usher him out of the office. "I told you to destroy all files on us."

"Colonel, this isn’t the time..."

"Why is there still a file on the STF1 on the data base?"

"I was in the process of remedying that," General Travis lied easily.

"Don’t bother. I’ve remedied it. If I discover there are any other files referring to my men - any of my men..." Chris left the statement hanging.

"Are you presuming to threaten General Travis?" Harris demanded. He had never met Larabee and had actually been looking forward to the day he could put the upstart in his place.

Chris turned his eyes on the seated man. Agent Harris felt the blood drain from his face. Never had he seen a man with such cold and dispassionate eyes. There was no question in his mind Larabee could and would pull his revolver and gun him down should the mood take him.

"No, I’m reminding him." Chris flicked his attention back to Travis, the message on his face extremely clear. Without further explanation, the leader of E.M.6 marched out of the office. The remaining four occupants felt the tension between their shoulders ease.

"An interesting man."

Travis glanced at the speaker and nodded. "But one of the best."

"One of the best? He’s a psychopath!" Harris cried.

"No, just extremely protective of his men."

"When he said, all of his men, did he mean Standish as well?" Freeman inquired.

Travis nodded. "Ezra Standish is one of Larabee’s men. You would be wise to wipe him from your files." Freeman nodded and made a mental note to do so the moment he left the meeting.

"What did he mean, he was reminding you?"

Travis sighed, his mind wandering back to the day the words had been spoken. If you ever betray us or endanger the lives of one of my men... I’ll come for you!  What a mess!

**********

Night descended on the country’s capital. Two men dressed in combat fatigues crossed the empty park and headed for the small rotunda. The lights around the park cast unholy shadows, but then, these were unholy men in the pursuit of unholy deeds.

"Good evening," the man waiting in the rotunda greeted as the rough looking pair arrived.

"If you say so," one snarled. The well-dressed man grimaced and then handed a plain manila folder across to one of the mercenaries. The only distinguishing mark on the folder was the word, "Texan".

"Where is the target?" the larger of the two mercenaries asked.

"Somewhere on the planet Earth."

"We’ll find him."

"For fifty million dollars, I should hope so. I’m hiring a small army, I expect results."

"You’ll get them. Do you want the privilege of speaking to the target before we exterminate him?"

"No, I just want him dead."

The two soldiers smiled. "Dead is what we do best. Besides," the cold man declared, his voice cutting, "this one’s personal."

"Any clues where we might start?" the other mercenary asked.

"Yes, as a matter of fact. His former employer mentioned... "

**********

Somewhere....

The horse whinnied its content. The rider smiled and rubbed the animal’s neck vigorously. The two were standing looking over the plain below them, the Texas moon lighting up the open country.

Sighing deeply, the young man in the buckskin coat studied the huge full disk in the sky above him. His life was a conundrum - so many questions and no answers. Pain he felt to the core, but didn’t understand.

"Reckon we should be headin’ back, fella." The thin cowboy climbed into the saddle easily and coaxed his mount forward. "Come on, boy." The horse responded immediately and broke into a gallop. The tracker felt the wind blowing his shoulder length hair out behind him. Why was it he only felt complete and free when he was alone and riding in the middle of the night? Was it because it was then he felt closest to who he really was? Or was it because as he was riding he often zoned out... lost in a world where conscious thought didn’t exist but where feeling and ‘knowing’ resided - knowing he wasn’t alone. Feeling someone beside him watching his back. It was a peculiar feeling, but one that left the rider feeling safe and content.

**********

Chris splashed water on his face, cursing as he did so. The same damn dream. Riding out there with Vin - side by side - watching his young friend’s back just as he’d promised.

Chris moved away from the mirror and walked back into the bedroom. Without knowing why, he stepped out onto the veranda of his small military apartment. Above him was a full moon. As Chris stared up at it, the ‘knowing’ he felt began to fade - just as it had done every night for the past six weeks.

Confused, the leader of E.M.6 swore. He wanted to believe Vin was alive... but if he was, why hadn’t his best friend sought the team out? Was it because he felt betrayed by Chris? Or was it because of the truth Chris feared? A truth that suggested Vin had died in the jungles of Katinda all alone - alone and clinging to the hope his team would fulfill their sacred pledge and come for him.

Larabee fought to control his emotions. The more he thought about it, the more logic demanded to be heard. Logically, one had to accept the facts and the facts pointed to only one thing - Vin Tanner had died two years earlier.

Physically gone, but alive only and always in Larabee’s heart where he would remain until the day Chris himself passed away.

**********

"You look tired," Buck commented as Chris stepped out of the elevator the next morning.

"Interrupted nights," Larabee grumbled.

Buck eyed his colonel but decided against pursuing the topic. He had considered suggesting if Chris thought Vin was alive they should resume their search for him. Somehow, Buck knew it was the wrong thing to do. Chris had almost admitted he needed to believe Vin was alive so he could survive. If the men searched and discovered the truth they all were certain they would discover Chris would be left with nothing.

"Ezra, have you cracked the code?"

"Standish looked up from his desk.  "Colonel, if I were a coarse man, I would be swearing and cursing at this point, but as I’m a gentleman, I will simply say this particular code is..."

"That’s a ‘no’, Colonel," Josiah translated.

"Josiah, anything more on that warehouse explosion?"

"Nope. Except, they think there were fragments of money found."

"Keep me informed. J.D.?"

"The print out of the first file is on your desk. No movement on that fifty million dollar contract. The President of some tin pot little African country is going to visit the States next week - maybe the contract’s on him."

"Maybe. Good work."

Nathan handed his leader a mug of coffee. Chris allowed a smile to flash across his eyes. "Thanks, Nathan."

"You eaten anything this morning?"

"I’ll be in my office reading the file if anyone wants me." Chris moved off ignoring Nathan’s shaking head.

"He’s got to start looking after himself," the medic muttered. Buck glanced at his dark-skinned friend.

"A man’s got to care about himself to do that, and Chris doesn’t care if he lives or dies." The statement brought the attention of all the men in the office. For several seconds there was silence. It was unlike Buck to be so negative.

"You okay, Buck?" J.D. asked.

"Yeah, Kid. Sorry. Just rolled out of bed the on the wrong side."

"You roll out alone?" Josiah asked grinning.

"Yes, as a matter of fact."

"That explains it."

Buck grinned, his spirits immediately lifting. "I will have you know..." The elevator door opened and a man in a suit stepped out. All recognized him as the FBI liaison officer - the one Chris had words with the day before.

"I wish to speak to Colonel Larabee."

"I wish to win a million dollars, looks like we’re both out of luck," Ezra commented. Agent Pascoe glared at the smiling con man and moved through the desk area toward Chris’ office. Before he reached his destination, Larabee stepped out.

"Colonel Larabee."

"Pascoe."

"I have come for your apology." Josiah, Buck, Nathan, Ezra and J.D. all burst into spontaneous fits of laughter.

"You’re going to be waiting a while, Brother."

"Until I receive an apology for the appalling way you treated me in front of my fellow agents, I am refusing to work with you."

"Promises, promises," Buck roared.

Chris glanced at his men who were trying desperately to regain control of themselves. "I think you better take it up with our liaison officer. Ezra," Chris ordered.

"Yes...well..." Ezra managed to get out as his lungs finally settled. "Let us see. Your superiors are disenchanted with E.M.6’s official doctrine of authority, but unfortunately the logistics of the constitution have little, if anything, to do with us. May I recommend you suggest to your supervisor he takes it up with the President for it is the President’s signature on the bottom of our contract."

"I’m not interested in that. I want an apology and I want it in front of my colleagues."

"Hmmm. Then I must admit, you do seem to have a problem," Ezra agreed. "You see, an apology is about as likely as boars self propelling themselves through the air."

"Look, either you apologize, Larabee or..."

"Now, now, my friend. Let us not drop to the demeaning level of name-calling. It would appear the major area of concern is your lack of metacognition regarding this matter. I do believe Colonel Larabee made himself abundantly clear last time you conversed, so unless you would like your proboscis cavities invaded by the Colonel’s knuckles or your derriere decorated with a standard issue rifle, may I suggest that you vacate our premises."

"See what I meant about finesse," J.D. pointed out, beaming.

"You think you’re above the law, Larabee. Well, you’re not," Pascoe spat, stabbing a finger in Chris’ direction.

"Actually, technically, we don’t have to obey the law," Josiah pointed out.

"It’s in the fine print on our contracts," Buck added grinning.

Pascoe turned to Chris. "You and your misfits gallivant around the world without respect for those you trample over. But your days are numbered. The FBI and the CIA are getting together on this."

"We’re shaking in out boots," J.D. giggled.

Pascoe’s face went red. Larabee was standing calmly in the middle of the room, apparently unfazed by his men’s insubordination to an agent as highly ranked as Pascoe. "I suppose you think all of this is funny, well, you listen to me, ‘Cowboy’..."

Josiah, Nathan and Buck froze, the smiles wiped from their faces instantly. Chris’s head tilted to the side. What could be a smile invaded his face, but only a brave man would call it a smile.

Pascoe felt the hair stand up on the back of his neck. The atmosphere in the room changed instantly.

"Did he just call me a cowboy, J.D.?" Chris demanded.

"Yes, Sir, Colonel Larabee, I think he did." The youth responded.

"At least once," Ezra added.

"He hates that," Josiah murmured in sympathy.

"Stupid bastard’s done it now," Buck muttered.

"Did you just call me a cowboy?" Chris asked, brushing his coat back to reveal his holstered gun.

"No, what I meant was..." Pascoe stuttered. "Shit!" The FBI liaison officer turned, grabbed the fire exit door and disappeared down the stair well.

The men in the office burst out laughing again.

"I thought the poor bastard was going to wet himself," Buck laughed.

"No, what I meant was...shit!" J.D. mimicked.

"Why do I get the feeling you have played out that scenario before?" Ezra asked his leader. Buck, Josiah and Nathan stilled, their anxious eyes flicking to Larabee.

Chris winked at Ezra. "We have. A long time ago."

Ezra realized he needed to tread carefully. Chris was opening up. "Care to tell us about it?"

"Not now. I want to get through that file, but I’m sure one of the others will oblige." Chris turned and wandered back into his office.

Buck started breathing again. Nathan and Josiah exchanged a relieved glance.

"He’s beginning to come to terms with it," Josiah muttered.

"So I take it last time, Lieutenant Tanner was involved?" Ezra guessed.

"Yeah, he was. Some two bit-colonel was trying to make a name for himself and confronted Chris. Called him a hotdog and cowboy." Buck smiled at the memory.

"Chris did exactly what he did here, scared the shit out of the other guy without even raising his voice. Afterwards, Vin started calling Chris cowboy," Josiah chuckled.

"Chris genuinely hates it, but Vin always seemed to get away with it," Nathan added.

**********